You have learned the wonderful news that you are expecting another child in the family. You have confirmed your assumptions and you already have a date when you expect the arrival of the firstborn. Your next step is to share this wonderful news with other family members. Whether you have decided to reveal the secret at the beginning of your pregnancy or to wait for the first few months, an interesting task of how to do it awaits you. It is especially exciting when you have an older child or children that you will soon surprise. They should definitely be prepared for the arrival of the baby.
The key is simplicity
The younger the children, the easier it is to tell the news. Older children may have different reactions and you should not be upset about it. I know from experience that the simpler you approach this task, the more successfully you will complete it. Also, the more children you have, the more each one will be happier accepted. It’s amazing, actually, how openly children accept new life. For them, babies are something so natural that their greatest wish is for the home to be full of little babies. I’ve noticed (which is a bit ridiculous) that older kids have their deadline. When the youngest in the family approaches the age of about 2, questions begin when the new baby will arrive. Because, of course, it’s time for a newcomer to take care of.
So, we bring you some tips on how to prepare for the arrival of a new family member. In doing so, always be guided by what – the simpler you approach everything, the more successful you will be.
The first conversation about a newcomer
If your husband and you have previously thought and prayed for a new child in the family, it is possible that the older child is already aware of your desire. In this way, they probably got used to the idea that the family could grow. Announcing the good news then will not be a big step for you or a surprise to the child.
If the baby surprised you, it might not be a bad idea to postpone the announcement to the older child for a while and prepare him for the news in a short time. When you are given the opportunity or the conversation develops on its own, ask the child what he thinks about the arrival of a new baby in the family. When you see that he has accepted the idea of a new member, cheer him up with the news that his wish has come true. Explain to him that you will need a lot of his help and that the baby will enjoy the care of an older sibling. Also try to guess whether the baby will be a girl or a boy.
Expand the news!
Feel free to entrust this task to your child. There is no better or sweeter way you can tell your loved ones the news. The statements “Mom is carrying a baby in her womb.” Or “I’ll have brothers or sisters.” Will not leave anyone indifferent. By doing so, you have given the child importance, and freed yourself from some of the uncertainty.
Involve your baby in the most important steps during pregnancy
Explain to him in a simple way the most important steps during pregnancy. Do not burden him with possible problems, focus on bringing him closer to how the baby is developing. It will be interesting for him to know how long and heavy the baby is or which parts of the body are recognizable. Show him the ultrasound picture, even if the baby is just a dot, the child will be interested. If you feel a craving for a particular food, fruit or ice cream, invite your child to enjoy a snack with you.
In the later months of pregnancy, when you are already specifically preparing for the arrival of the baby, involve the older child in choosing clothes for the newborn. Pull out the robe your child wore when he was a baby. This will cheer him up and stimulate the imagination to imagine his sister or brothers in his robe. I believe this will turn into real fun.
Wait with the big transitions
If your baby is just at the stage when he should be weaned from diapers, the most common advice you will get is to wait until after the baby is born. However, let the children mature on their own, that is, before we would expect them to. I want to say that if you see that the child is ready to leave the diaper, feel free to support him in it no matter at what point the process begins. If you think that such a big step would be a problem for your child, of course you will wait. Expert advice will certainly go in the direction of not introducing significant life changes in the child’s life at the end of pregnancy, such as going to kindergarten or separating to your own room, but to do so in a quieter time.
Get ready to come together: a baby corner
Talk to an older child about how to arrange a corner where the baby will stay. Ask him for his opinion on where the crib might stand, what sheets and blankets to buy, which mobile to choose and the like. In this way, you give it importance, but also prepare it for the soon arrival of the baby. In a little while, the person imagining will get a real shape. The more the child is involved, the more eagerly he gets to know the newcomer.
What is equally important is to let him know that the love you feel for children is always equal to everyone. Explain to him that parental love is not shared and passed from child to child but multiplied and that the parental heart grows with the arrival of each new child. When the baby arrives at the house, allow the brothers or sister to touch the baby, help with the change of clothes, entertain her in an appropriate way. Do not keep the baby separate from the older child for fear that something will happen to her. Always be present when the baby is in the center of the child’s attention and supervise the game.
Keep it simple and relaxed
Children feel and see how parents behave and how they react. If you are relaxed and understand the arrival of the first child as something completely natural, it is very likely that your older child will react in a similar way. Don’t complicate things too much and don’t speak out loud about your fears so the child doesn’t copy them on themselves. If you notice that an older child is jealous, try not to pay too much attention to it. It is especially important that you do not indulge them in requirements that they would not otherwise meet. The feeling of jealousy will pass very quickly, include one extra “I love you” during the day and be patient.
Livija Rogulj – Excellent woman
Photo: Petra Zelić